I'm A Quiter!

Ok so I have ALWAYS been a quiter. Things get too hard and I quit. I was no good at sports so I quit. The Air Force was too hard so I quit. College was too hard to pay for so I quit. You get the picture. I think the thing I most regret quiting was music and I really believe that quiting that made quiting everything else so much easier.
You see music was the one thing I loved to do more than anything. It was the only talent I had. But I got too arrogant with it. Back in Junior High I tried out for the high school choirs Reflections and Company "B". I had dreamed of being in those choirs since I was in first grade. No joke. So I made it into reflections my freshman year and Company "B" my Sophomore year. I really thought I was hot stuff. The problem came the next year when we got a new teacher. Not because he was a bad teacher, just the opposite. He was a great vocal teacher the problem was me. I was so arrogant I didn't think I needed any improvement. I didn't gleen all I could from his instruction. I didn't go to him for private voice lessons like others did. And when the time came to autition for the new group that he created my arrogance caused me to be an alternate rather than one of the choir members. I was crushed and I cried for weeks. Seriously I literally cried for weeks. My friends all told me that I shouldn't get down that I could always come to the rehearsals and maybe I would get in by my show of dedication and willingness to get better. And instead of taking it as a chance to improve myself I just gave up. Oh I went back my senior year and sang in Company "B" but I was so mad at my teacher and resented him. I blamed him for very long time. I still liked him just fine but I just knew that if my old teacher had been there that I would have been chosen hands down. I didn't take into consideration that my old teacher was fine with mediocrity and my new teacher pushed to makes us better. It wasn't until my brother got into middle school that I realized the disservice I did to myself. Don got the benefit of this teachers instruction for six years. Don is phenominal. Why? Because he listened and learned everything he would from that man. My brother is being asked by Eastern Oregon University to come study in their music program. I wouldn't say that I couldn't have been taught like he was I just had an unteachable attitude. But once I left school I gave up all my music dreams from being a singer to being a music teacher. And because I quit the one thing I truly loved it made it so much easier to quit everything else.
So now here I am trying to loose weight and it is easy to quit. I have quit diet and exercise programs dozens of times just in my five year marriage. I am really hoping I can quiet this inner monologue that says "you never finish anything, you are just a quiter. And that is all you will ever be." I want to be a finisher. I want to have some follow through. I want to look at myself at the end of all of this and be able to say that I finally resisted the urge to quit. Hey maybe if I can do that maybe I can take up my dreams of music and start the long road of finishing them too.